Slushy Tourettes

Any of my friends that know me, know that I write poetry, or as my best friend calls it, 'Slushy Tourettes'. I write mainly for myself, rather than for a particular person and my friends description is lovingly fitting. I have written a book of poetry, that will be given to everyone at my funeral (suppose I had better sign it now) and have several hundred poems that did not make the book. 

I was travelling yesterday, thinking about us coming to the first official day of Autumn, and this came in to my muddled head.

As the summer of my life fades gently into the distance

May I appreciate with grace the days my Autumn will bring

For like the trees that shed their leaves to make way for new life

Then my body I will depart 

It has become very noticeable to myself this week, that my body is changing. I already knew about the weight loss, although as I was overweight to begin with, 3 1/2 stone is a big improvement. Going down from a 36 waist to a 31 has meant some new trousers/jeans and a smaller belt and have had to go to charity shops and get myself a few medium build tops. The final straw though is having to get new boxers because my older ones wont stay up (thought you might all like to know that). 

The real pin in my balloon though was taking a look at my legs. For years, I was a rugby player at quite a decent level and when my body could take no more of being hit, I took up squash, playing two or three times a week. My legs were powerful, muscular and strong as a result and were always my favourite bit about me. However, after some treatments, I had a long soak in the bath and lay there and stare at two pieces of me that I could hardly recognise. The muscle definition has gone, although the are still reasonably strong from all the walking. I then looked at the rest of my body, something I very rarely do. My hips are now bony and my upper arms have lost any passing thought of the weights they used to lift. I still have muscle there but if I look long enough, I can convince myself that the skin is getting tighter and tighter.

However, I do not wish anyone to think that I am all doom and gloom, as that is certainly not me. I have so much to be thankful for and I tell each day so, as I dance with it. My daughter is back in my life, albeit still not at the stage of meeting up but hours chatting. My best friend has again surpassed herself and I have some wonderful friends and special people in my life. I have sorted out some good treatments (had a few already) and have now finished my fourth week without any medication.

I have people in contact with me everyday, saying how my musings have helped them make their own decisions (THEIR OWN, NOT MINE) and on twitter, I am a dancing tart, having numerous partners everyday. 

Right, back to writing my slushy stuff :))